July 18, 2007
An open letter to the Burrito Tally
To whom it may concern,
As a life long eater and fan of frivolous contests I am writing to take issue with the rules and bylaws of the “Burrito Tally.” In short, I was shocked to learn that self-prepared burritos were to be excluded from the tally. The partisan approach of only including store bought burritos is a barbaric policy and completely undermines the ethos on which all Spinto Band tallies are built.
As far back as I can remember, the Spinto Band’s extracurricular activities have provided a jovial backdrop for the bands exploits and enabled us to pass and/or waste time in an enjoyable manner. Unfortunately, the current rules of the Burrito Tally threaten the band and their cohorts’ freedom to choose how they consume burritos by pressuring them to buy store bought burritos. Furthermore, by excluding homemade burritos, the Burrito Tally begins to marginalize resourcefulness and frugality, some of the characteristics that the Spinto Band has relied on for survival since it’s inception, the grift perhaps being the preeminent fruit sown from these ideological seeds.
As a citizen of this band I urge one and all to strike down this hypocrisy and up hold the precedents set by the bands founding fathers.
"A free people [claim] their rights as derived from the laws of nature, and not as the gift of their chief magistrate." –Roy Spinto