August 15, 2005

Shark vs. Bear

So after we played a fun show at the Paradox on Saturday we tracked down a 24-hour bowling alley to help settle and argument. In recent months the spinto band has been trying to figure out who would win in a fight between a bear and a shark. There are arguments for both sides that have kept this beast war on the tip of our tongues since the beginning of the summer. We figured the best way to settle the argument was to split into two teams, title one team “team bear” and the other team “team shark,” and declare a winner based upon whichever team bowled the higher score. We had an initial warm up game and then the battle came forth. The bar had closed at this hour.
The teams were broken down like so: Team Bear consisted of Jeremy “Jrod Manface if your nasty”, Jeff Hobson, Kat Kat Kat Kat Pickle, Big Jon Eaton, and Sam “Crusher” Hughes. Team Shark was as follows: Thomas Foolery, Mojo, Klaus Krill, Kellen “Groo”, and Carly “I mess people up by smacking them in the butt when they are about to bowl” McSpazalot aka Lane Bowler Data. All was going well and the battle was heated. Everyone was doing the strike bumps and shark fins*. The scoring was close and it came down to the final frame. We were finally going to settle the debate that had plagued relationships since 2003. Then all of a sudden, the tenth frame went sour. Everyone started bowling and no matter how many pins they knocked, or gutters they fell into, the computer marked their roll a strike. It was disastrous. Everyone got turkeys on the tenth frame and the whole competition was for nothing. I was so bummed I threw a ball into a gentleman’s lane who was bowling next to us. I was also pretty drunk. No debates were settled, no winners were crowned, and best of all, there were no losers. We tried to talk to “Peen” Mike Dickeyhed about giving us a discount, which he agreed to since such high stake bowling shouldn’t end with such a malfunction, about getting a discount. Peen said he would give us one, but then charged us full price anyway and there were so many of us, no one knew what was going on and we just paid. We also were in a bit of a rush to get back to Seattle headquarters and listen to R. Kelly’s Trapped in a Closet.


*a shark fin is where you put one hand on your forehead, palm first, pointing towards the sky, bend down a bit, and swivel like a swimming shark.

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3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Maybe this is because I'm about to become a world religion teacher, but did you consider that maybe it's meant to stay a mystery? The "forces that be" converged on that little 24-hour bowling alley and BAM! "malfunction" of technology.
I'd call it a mircale malfunction.

Anonymous said...

I would say the question was answered. In the match between bear and shark, a heated battle ensues only to be thrown out of wack by a bunch of turkeys.

--Joe

Anonymous said...

Funk that, y'alls know the bear would win. I've said it before and I'll say it again: shark will get a good bite in at first but bear will start wailing that shark's face for real. And once you hit a shark in the face it gets real messed up. BOO YA!