July 21, 2007

Sam Hughes Reviews: Manhattan Special Cream Soda

Sam Hughes Reviews: Manhattan Special Cream Soda

This review must be prefaced with the fact that I had somewhat of a religious experience earlier today. No, I haven’t converted to Islam (yet) nor did I become a Hare Krishna (double yet), but today I met John Nese, a man I have proclaimed the Soda Jesus. His knowledge of soda was unbelievably immense and just being within earshot of his words made me feel as if I have apostle status. Maybe I won’t go that far, but as you’ll see in our little video post on him which will hopefully be up soon, dude knows what he’s talking ‘bout. I know I’ll go into his wonderful soda shop (www.sodapopstop.com) again, and I kind of want to ask him if I can be his adopted grandson (sorry, real grandpa) so I can one day own his store (or better yet open one up on the East Coast), but truly I am not worthy yet. I thought I knew a lot, but I clearly have some work to do. I shall start with this review!

I decided to buy this very Cream Soda because of the recommendation of Mr. Ness, and I wasn’t disappointed. As John explained, (first name basis, why not?) the Manhattan Special soda company is appropriately enough located in New York City and they have quite the penchant for using the most natural ingredients. When I first glanced at this soda, I wondered what the little particles were doing floating around in there. I mean, this is a cream soda we’re talking about here, what the hell is it that shit? Curdled cream? Gross! No, no, no, the little particles were actually tiny pieces of real vanilla bean! And guess what their orange soda has in it? Real fucking orange pulp! Guess what their pube soda has in it? Real pubes!*

Anyway, the shock and awe of the beautiful vanilla bean aside, of course this product also uses pure cane sugar instead of high fructose corn syrup. C’mon, I didn’t have to tell you that, yeah, you knew that already. Upon opening the bottle (not even a twist-off!), I put my nostrils to the test to see how natural this thing smelled. Well, if you’ve ever put your nose to a bottle of vanilla extract, and I know you have, then you would know what this cream soda smells like. This left me worried about the taste of it. It’s gotta be too strong after a whiff like that, right? No, not right! It’s absolutely refreshing, crisp, and the asshole of all adjectives, sublime. I never really wanted to use that word to describe anything besides that shitty band that, but Manhattan Special cream soda made me do it. You happy about that, soda? Well, you should be, you delicious specimen, you. Maybe it’s the euphoria of the experience I had today at the soda store, or maybe the soda is just that good, but here are the reviews. Definitely the best cream soda I’ve ever had.

Galco’s Soda Shop: 1000000000000000000/10!

Manhattan Cream Soda: 9.5/10

*Ridiculously false. But, if Manhattan Special soda company were depraved enough to make a pube soda, you can guarantee that shit would be straight off the balls, no artificial polyester pubes or something.

1 comment:

krisan said...

how would you rate jones cream soda in comparison to manhattan? i'm not one to drink "soda" but i've got a can o jones cream now and i feel like i need to finish off with water. its making me thirsty where i was hoping for refreshing.